What I Thought Was the Truth
by Jaiida Toshi
Summary: This is the story of Auron that you haven't heard. Auron's past, his future, and even his present are nothing but a blur to him. But when a mysterious girl makes him remember things he didn't want to remember, what's going to happen?
1. A Pair of Blue Eyes

Hello! This is my first fanfiction ever! It's basically a story of Auron and a certain somebody else, and their life. I've actually only played bits of FFX and X-2, but something about Auron just stuck with me...So yeah! For now, this story is rated PG-13, but it's basically guaranteed to change to R. Sorry about that...It's just how it has to be! (There won't be anything too terrible in it, just some gore, language...and maybe some extra fluff...) Anyway, this is chapter one, which is just a little intro to the story! Hope you enjoy!

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**More Than Meets the Eye**

**By: Jaiida Toshi **

**Chapter 1: A Pair of Blue Eyes **

The end was near. I suppose I had known all along that the end would come some day. I guess I just never actually thought about the subject long enough to actually see the end come. Until now, that is.

I was unable to even accept the thought of my summoner dieing, let alone actually think about it. Being that I was so unable to think of this fact, I had devised a new plan. My summoner wasn't going to die. Not as long as I could help it.

Still, no matter how I thought about it, I knew that facing Sin head on wasn't the way. It just wasn't. Why did I decide to do it that way, then?

Her chin was held firm, and her eyes were directly on Sin, no where else. They were a sparkly, almost baby-blue color, and usually had the most gentle glow coming from them. However, as she glared angrily at the monster in front of us, those normally gentle eyes appeared to be cooler than ice itself. With her long golden hair blowing in every direction with the wind, she held tightly onto her summoning staff, and gently tucked her bottom lip behind her teeth, chewing on her lip with a slight nervousness to it.

I could tell she had swallowed, and then, taking a deep breath, she said, without a hint of anxiety or nervousness to her tone, "Alright everybody, let's go."

I had expected her to say something more like, "This is it. This is where we defeat Sin. Here," but she didn't say anything else. She glanced at her other three guardians, who were just some misfits from around Spira, and then to me. Our eyes met, and with almost a silent apology from her, her eyes left mine, and she took a step toward Sin.

"This is it," she said then, just as I had figured she would. She turned, with her hair, shining almost red in the early morning sunlight, and faced us all once more. Again, our eyes met, but almost as soon as they did, she turned her face from me, and back toward Sin.

I wondered if there was a reason that she was purposely avoiding me, but I couldn't tell for sure. She seemed suddenly unsure of herself, and suddenly apologetic. As if there was something she wanted to tell me, but somehow couldn't.

Before any other thoughts could pass my mind, the battle was on. Sin attacked first, with a spell I'd never before seen, wiping out one of our guardians. Blood sprayed from his body, and I could tell the others were all feeling queasy. Except for my summoner. She kept her head firm, taking a deep breath, and simply just closed her eyes slowly, and reopened them. Our two remaining guardians, excluding myself, attacked, only to be either killed or brutally wounded. The first one to attack was literally torn in half, but the other fought on.

It was then that I knew it was suicide. I felt ill, like I was about to vomit, but not from the scenes I had just viewed. The reasoning behind my sudden ill feelings was the knowledge that it was I who had been so eager for a way out, that I had sent my summoner to her death, as well as the rest of us. I always said the end was near. Now, however, I realized that the end wasn't at all as near as I figured. It was here.

Perhaps if my head wasn't so in thought, so dazed, I could have done something. I could have yelled to the three of us that were remaining to retreat. I was, after, all, basically in charge.

I was snapped back to life by the screams from my last remaining comrade as he was torn in half just as the one before him. I opened my moth to yell to my summoner, only to have the strangest feeling occur.

It's hard for me to say, but for all I know, what happened could have been Sin's attack. Yet, for some reason, it seems like something more.

My summoner turned her head, and looked at me. Her eyes shone with a gentle brightness like they usually did, and there seemed to be brightness all around her. In fact, the light was so bright, that I couldn't even make her out very well, other than in a blur.

I saw her lips move, as if she was saying something to me, but I didn't hear what it was. I figured I was dying.

The next thing I knew, the light grew so intense that I assumed I would be blinded, and then darkness followed.

I don't know when it was that I awoke, but I did. The three bodies of my comrades, my friends, were sprawled out around me, but Sin was gone. And Sin wasn't the only one that had disappeared. My summoner had gone with. She was no where to be found.

My chest heaved, and sweat drenched my entire body. Sitting up, and looking around, for I realized I knew not why my heart was racing so, I could only blink a few times. A dream, that's all it was. But a dream of what? I spent the rest of the night pondering on this thought. The only thing that entered my mind were two gentle blue eyes…But what 'gentle blue eyes'? I scoffed myself, and lay my head back down into my soft pillow, staring up at the stars that twinkled above my head, my thoughts elsewhere. I knew of no 'blue eyes', let alone gentle ones.

Giving a gentle laugh, for I found myself laughing at the thought of me falling for blue eyes. But for some reason, those blue eyes stayed in my head with me for the rest of the night.

I slept outside. I hated being inside. Being inside made me feel caged in, like a wild animal. Being inside reminded me of something I couldn't put to words, and just made me feel locked up. So, I slept outside. For the most part, anyway. Besides, when I was inside, it only gave me this nostalgic feel from the past. I didn't like thinking of the past.

I loved the stars. I couldn't explain why that was, but my love for them was almost unconditional. I scoffed myself again, thinking, "Damn Auron, if you don't get these poetic thoughts out of your head, you may just go soft."

I guess you could describe me as a rather uncaring person. For some time now, I had been extremely laid-back and simple, as well as fairly opinionated. If someone didn't agree with me, I made sure they agreed with me. That's just how I was.

I was the most famous guardian in all of Spira, although I was actually quite unaware of why. In my opinion, I'd never done anything worthy of being called 'great', and couldn't see why it was that so many decided to employ me the way they did. I turned every which one of those potential summoner-wannabes down that requested my help. It was just how I was. I didn't want to be a guardian to just anybody. After all, pilgrimages always made me remember the past. Or at least, the bits of the past that I was able to remember.

For the most part, my past was fuzzy, and I was only reminded of it with certain objects every now and then.

Sighing, I simply stared at the stars for a little longer, and then, closing my eyes, dipped into an almost uneasy sleep.


	2. A Pair of Green Eyes

Chapter 2: A Pair of Green Eyes

My eyes were blurred with tears, although I wasnt really sad. Well, I guess I was sad...But not sad enough to really even care. Logan was gone, out of my life. Forever. Perhaps that was why I felt so empty. Then again, maybe not.

I shoved my things forcefully into my suitcase, wondering why my relationships never worked out. They just never did. I supposed I had found true love at one time or another, but then again, maybe that had only been in my dreams.

Shutting the suitcase, I stood up with my tears now completely brushed away. Logan was in the past now. Something fell from the suitcase that I thought was closed, and I clumsily bent down to pick up the object, which was a picture frame, lying with its face toward the ground.

AWhats this? I questioned out loud, and picked it up, turning it over, only to see a picture of myself and a man with intense green eyes. He was about the age of twenty-six or so, and wore a little smirk on his face, which contrasted nicely with my large, happy smile.

AWhos this? I said, kneeling down and looking at it, before tucking it in my suitcase and, making sure it was closed this time, started off again.

I exited the temple that I had currently been staying at, looking back at it, deciding that it was about time I moved on. After all, it had been three days since Logan and I had broke up. Kilika was his home, not mine. And I never expected to make it mine.

My mind constantly wandered, and you could say I was a dreamer. I loved thinking of foreign places, meeting new people, helping out...

I was quite deep in thought, and didnt even notice myself walking away from the temple toward the boat, and then something hit me and knocked my suitcase out of my hands, causing me to snap back to life.

AHey! I shouted, as I noticed some thug had snatched my suitcase from me, AGive that back to me!

He looked back at me, with this smuggish smile, but kept on running. Frowning, for I was not in the mood, I chased after him, and caught up with him, grabbing the hooligan by the back of the shirt.

AYoud better give that back to me, I said harshly.

AOh yeah? And what will you do to me if I dont? he sneered.

AI dont think you want to know, I just said, and then slid my legs under his, tripping him, and sending him flying. He dropped the suitcase on its side, and I vaguely heard a crashing sound, as if something had broken.

Hoping it was nothing of importance, I simply picked the suitcase up, gave the boy one last glare, and then haughtily made my way back to the shipyard, where I had already decided to head. I was leaving Kilika. I had no idea where I was going, but I was going, and thats all there was to it.

I boarded the first ship out, knowing nothing more than the fact that it was heading for Luca. Finding a spot near the side of the ship, I decided to check my suitcase for that object that had dropped and broken.

I sorted through my stuff, but everything seemed to be in order. That was, of course, until I came across a small shard of glass.

AWhat is this? I thought, and then remembered that picture. Digging through my suitcase, I pulled out what remained of the frame.

The picture was still basically intact within the frame, but the frame was definitely destroyed.

Sighing, I pulled the frame out, only to have a small, folded sheet of paper fall out with it. AHuh? I just said, and must have sounded like a complete idiot, for people standing

around me all kind of looked at me funny, AWhats this?

I bent down and picked up the folded sheet of paper, and carefully unfolded it. It appeared to be a letter of some sort, and, taking a seat on the bench, I began to read it.

_My dearest Jade,_

_You possibly dont recall who I am, but I am the one who left you in Zanarkand when you were two. I was only ten at the time, and not old enough to care for you. Your father was my caretaker for quite some time and I feel as if Im your older brother. Your father was like a mentor to me, someone I really admired. I was utterly upset when your father died when you were about three, and decided to care for you myself as to fulfill a promise I made to a dying man. However, I was only ten or so, and just couldnt do it. Im sorry. Anyway, someday, I will come back for you. I promise._

_-Auron. _

AWhat is this about? I questioned myself, wondering who Auron was, or what ties he had with my father. I looked back to the picture. In the picture, I must have been like seventeen or so, and that wasnt that long ago. Why couldnt I remember? Lying my head back and looking into the clouds, I could only make up my mind about something right then and there.

I would go to Zanarkand, and find this Auron guy. Still, my head felt fuzzy, and I simply couldnt recall much at all.

Okay, Zanarkand it was, although I had no idea what I would find there, or even, truthfully, why I was going there exactly. All I knew was that I was going there, and that was that.

AOkay then, to Zanarkand. To find this Auron guy.


	3. Uncertainties

Chapter 3: Uncertainties

Zanarkand was the destination. It was the destination of all summoners and their guardians. It was where everything happened. Anything else was just a test.

This pilgrimage had been different from most that I had ever been on. We had worked our way down, being that my summoner had come from Bevelle. We had just left Besaid, our last temple, and were starting toward Zanarkand. We were to stay in Kilika for the night, at the temple.

I found myself distancing from the rest of the crew, the summoner, an older man named Aras. Aras basically had the money to pay for me, and that was the only reason I was guarding him. For the money. Besides, I truly believed Aras could defeat Sin. He had the talent. There were two other guardians besides myself, to friends of Aras. They weren't really guardian quality, but they would easily give their lives for Aras. They were about his age, both able-bodied, and strong enough. Still, in the face of danger, I was the only one who was able to truly step up and protect them.

There was something missing though. My passion for the job had dropped. There was no reason I wanted to protect Aras. Unlike her…

The ride to Besaid to Kilika was extremely uneventful, and as we reached land, we went straight to the temple. Apparently a young boy had died in the woods, and Aras was needed to perform a sending.

I decided to skip the sending, going straight to the temple. The temple of Kilika, that of the fire, was one that fit me, I thought. It was small and homey, and yet fiery and rebellious. Small and homey weren't really words to describe me, but at the same time, they seemed to fit. Temple-wise, that is. To me, temples were small and homey. Especially if they were the only home one had.

When I was young, I would constantly get into arguments with my parents. Family problems ran in my family. My mother was an adulteress, but it never seemed to bother my father. When I was very young, my brother had left us. I have no recollection of him at all.

My family wasn't one of those happy Spiran families. They were constantly arguing. I had no place to go, it seemed.

I would always flee to the temple. The nearest temple I could possibly find. Growing up in the Calm Lands, I didn't have much options for places to go. The Omega Temple, a small ruined temple was my only hope. I would go there, bursting through the heavy doors, and just cry. Of course, that was only when I was five.

If there was one thing my father taught me, it was to not cry. Tears weren't something that could be seen in my family. And so I learned not to cry. My blubbering years were behind me, and slowly, somehow, I became a man.

The temple was my solitude. Alone, I could just kneel there, on the hard floor, and think. It was through this time, that I decided to do something crazy. That crazy thing just happened to be becoming a guardian.

Suddenly, my thoughts stopped. I was standing in the middle of the temple in Kilika, not the ruins of the one in the Calm Lands. People were busy bustling around me, some of them hoping to catch the sending quickly. For the most part, however, there weren't the usual amount of people.

My thoughts started again, but they had taken a new direction. My father wasn't the one who had turned me into a man. It was someone else…

I didn't have much more time to think, as suddenly my summoner returned, tired from the sending. It was announced that it was time to sleep, and that we were taking an Al Bhed airship to Zanarkand.

And with that, I drifted off into a rather uneasy sleep.

-

That night, I dreamed of blue eyes once more. Whose? I couldn't even seem to decide. And yet, they seemed so familiar. It seemed to hit me whose they were, but then it would slip away. Almost like an uncertain memory. Was it even a memory? Or was it just a dream? I couldn't even think straight.

The ride in the airship gave me time to think, but I was unable to sort my thoughts out. Instead, I could only think of the battle that was before us. We would have to fight Sin. I'd seen it all before. My summoner would die, Sin would be defeated, I would be showered with attention and gifts, and then life would go back to normal. But what was normal? Had my life ever been normal? Probably not…But really, I couldn't even remember most of my life…

All of my memories seemed uncertain. Almost as if there was a block in my brain, as if there were parts missing. Yes, something was definitely missing. But I couldn't recall what it was.

We landed in Zanarkand in a very slight amount of time. Flying was much simpler than walking, but somehow, it seemed as if we were cheating. I put all that aside, though. There were more important things to worry about than if we were cheating. Besides, as I had learned, in life, there are no rules.

My mind seemed fuzzy, and even though the other guardians had asked me numerous times what would happen when we reached Zanarkand, I couldn't really say. I didn't know how to word it.

Aras wanted to go straight to the Zanarkand Dome, the ruins that laid ready for Summoners. The other guardians followed him nervously, but I trailed quite far behind. My eyes darted every which way, and I suddenly was becoming uncertain. I had been in the dome's ruins many times, but somehow, this time seemed different. Flashbacks that I couldn't quite place kept occurring, causing me to flinch. I wanted to try to put them into thought, but they would disappear once they reached the surface. All I saw were those same blue eyes, giving me an almost imploring look…

The process was simple. The Summoner was to choose someone to become the final aeon, the aeon would be summoned, Sin would die, and people would celebrate. It had all happened before, and it would happen again.

Aras was calm about the procedure, something other summoners hadn't been. I knew he would be, though. He had the talent. Some wanted to turn back and run away. Not Aras. He chose one of his guardians, the closest to him, and the two began the procedure.

Almost as if it were a dream, a faraway dream, they were gone. As was Sin.

The other two guardians were in shock. Absolute shock. Most were, though. I'm sure I would have been as well, if I could recall my first pilgrimage, of course.

As I watched the procedure, I realized something. In Spira, there truly was only one way to be happy. Death.

The remaining two summoners were weak. I figured they would soak in glory, for they helped to beat Sin, but then they would drift off to nowhere in particular, and perhaps end up killing themselves, perhaps by a simple slit to the wrist.

Suddenly, it was as if something dawned on me.

Death. Death was true happiness. Memories would flash. Death would bring answers to any questions I had. Honestly, it would.

Was I weak? I had heard of many who had taken 'the easy way out'. Was I one of them? I had no reason to do it, I really didn't. …Or maybe I did.

I was sick of it. There was no point to go on. It would all happen again. The death, that is. Why not just end it?

My eyes slowly looked up to the towering buildings above me, and my mind began to run. How simple it would be, to stand up on one, and simply fall?

Without even thinking, I ran toward the nearest building, and climbed the steps, rushing. A smile crept onto my face, as I reached the top.

Fresh air greeted me, a slight breeze. Perfect for death.

And with that as my final thought, I prepared to jump. I was just about to do so, when I looked down and saw two blue eyes, staring up at mine. Two very familiar blue eyes…


	4. The Encounter

Chapter 4: The Encounter

Zanarkand was a rather dirty city in my opinion. Why I felt I had to go there was beyond me. It was as if some invisible force was pulling me toward it, and I simply followed.

I didn't know where I was going necessarily, just that I was going somewhere. My suitcase was growing heavy, and the main thing on my mind was finding an inn to stay at, and then wandering through the city.

I had to admit though, I was beginning to worry. It was night, and people were out and about everywhere. Sure, I could take care of myself, but if a large group were to jump me, I would do the best I could to take care of them, but…Well, I chose not to think any further on that subject.

As I walked, I suddenly found myself stopping. There was a coldness in the air, almost as if someone was looking at me. I looked up, to see a man high in the distance, up on a building, looking almost as if he was going to jump. His eyes were staring down at her, hard, almost as if he was mad at her for being in his way.

However, the expression on his face wasn't angry. It was quite unexplainable. I tore my eyes away from him, and kept walking. That cold feeling didn't go away though.

I finally found an inn. It was a quaint little place, but I figured it would do. I dropped off my suitcase on the bed, and realized that I was quite hungry.

Sighing, I told myself I couldn't eat until I'd at least spent some time looking for whoever the man was in the picture.

I took a seat on the bed and pulled out the broken frame, sliding any remaining glass off into the garbage. I took the slightly folded picture and held it close to my face, examining it, almost as if I couldn't believe it were real.

I cocked my head to the side, as I gazed at the man in the picture. He suddenly appeared much more familiar than he had before, as if I had seen him recently. But I hadn't, had I?

I tucked the picture in my pocket and started off, not knowing exactly where I was going, and mostly just hoping I didn't get lost.

I wandered around for quite some time, but realized I was simply traveling in circles. I was growing exhausted, and spotted a small diner. Deciding I had searched long enough, I entered the diner, and took a seat in one of the small cushioned seats at the bar.

I had ordered my food, when I got the strangest feeling, as if someone were staring straight at me. I looked around, but nobody was. They were all minding their own businesses, reading newspapers, chatting to each other, or just sipping their coffee, watching the blitzball game that was playing on TV.

I turned back to my dinner, but had to look up numerous times to make sure no one was watching me. Finally, I just left my dinner half-eaten, paid, and left. I couldn't stand that feeling.

I got outside and wondered where I should even begin to look. I traveled around in circles for another hour or so, but this time, I was heavily on my guard.

That feeling that someone was watching me never disappeared. I began to walk faster and faster, not realizing I was doing it. My heart quickened by the minute, and I couldn't help but feel somewhat dizzy.

I checked over my shoulder for a stalker quite often, but never saw anybody. Was I dreaming? Was I paranoid?

Finally, I decided that perhaps the best thing to do would be to go back to the inn and sleep. Perhaps I was just tired.

I started toward the inn, when a horrible realization hit me. I was lost. In my desire to get away from whoever was following me, I hadn't paid as much attention to where I was going. Panic began to settle in my stomach, and the feeling seemed to grow.

If I had been one to cry, I probably would have. I told myself to hold it together and look strong, to give my follower, whether he was real or imaginary, the appearance that I wasn't frightened. However, no matter how hard I tried, it couldn't be done. I still appeared horribly frightened.

I began to try to rationalize with myself. _"Jade, it's no one. It's just your mind. Stop thinking about it! Figure out where you are! Look, there's a nice looking guy. Go ask him directions to the inn…He's not the stalker! Go! I told you, he's NOT the stalker! Too late, you passed him."_

I figured it was only a matter of time before I lost my mind. Soon, it seemed as if everybody was following me. _"Maybe he wasn't such a nice guy…Isn't that him again! He must be the stalker! Wait, that's not him…Or is it? Nope, it's not…Is it!"_

I was so deep in my worry and panic that I suddenly smacked straight into someone, the force nearly knocking me over.

I looked to see who I had ran into, only to realize that it was a man, slightly older than I, who had been standing with his back to me, facing a circle of who I assumed were his friends.

"Hey there," he said, looking at me.

"Um, hi," I just said, and turned to leave. He caught my arm, however, and twirled me around to face him.

"And what are you doing running around at this time of the night?" he asked, his buddies suddenly surrounding me.

"Looking for my boyfriend," I lied, "He should be right around here."

The man holding my arm laughed, and I knew he didn't buy my story.

I mentally counted how many there were. Seven. Okay, I could have easily taken on four or five, but by the time I reached the sixth and seventh, they could already stab me, or shoot me…And I didn't have any weapons on myself.

I thought about fighting, but the realization that they could have weapons was what kept me back. Maybe they were just nice and wouldn't hurt me. Of course, I knew I was kidding myself to think that. Especially with what the man said next.

"We'll teach you to be out at this time," the man said, and evil glint in his eye, "Right boys?"

"Right," they all said, eyeing me hungrily.

I swallowed, wondering which guy to take out first. Of course, the one holding my arm would be a good starting place.

Before I could decide, however, I received a horrible blow to my skull, which sent me crumpling to the ground. My eyes began to lose focus, but not before I could see someone come out of no where, and see the man who had been holding my arm, fall over in pain, and the man next to him, as the mysterious newcomer slashed them with his sword.

My eyes continued to go in and out of focus, each time revealing a newly wounded man from the group. As the final man fell, I caught a glimpse of my rescuer, only to realize something.

There was no doubt that he was the man from the picture.

With that final thought, my eyes finally lost focus completely, and I blacked out.


End file.
